I'm typically pretty good at handling stress. I remember my deep breathing, I try to make sure I get some physical exercise in [if I haven't been in my regular routine], I drink lots of water, and try to keep things balanced. However, there are times [like now] when it just all seems to mount up farther and faster than I can keep my eye level above. I've been battling an atrocious headache/migraine for over a week now - stress induced. Fortunately I've got an amazing chiropractor [Dr. Erik Lerner] that takes great care of me and a sweet friend who will squeeze the living tar out of my right trapezius [where I seem to carry all my stress] thus helping to inhibit the migraine coming and ease some of the extreme tension.
Side note: I didn't think I was carrying that much stress so I was perplexed when the headaches were coming on - normally it's just a sign that my neck is out of alignment. I knew my stress carrier was up near my right scapula from years past when I used to worry and stress a lot, but when Priscilla whipped out her pinchers that had the grip of a pit bull, I actually grimaced in pain. [For those of you who don't know, I have a VERY high pain tolerance. When it comes to massages, the harder the better.] She managed to find some spot when pushed upon it felt like a claw wrapping around my head, down my arm, behind my ear, around my eyeball... so weird. Recognizing the intensity I could feel with the pressure from her pushing on one little spot [she said she was hardly pushing] I was sure it was helping. I jokingly made a comment about "X" marks the spot... the next thing I know she comes over, with Sharpie in hand, and draws a "x" on me. [This was just a super random side note of a story for your reading enjoyment :)]
Where were we? Oh yes, stress. This is one of those times there seems to be so much going on, so much adding up, and many decisions to make. One of the leading stressors in my life currently is my job. I LOVE my girls and the time I get to spend with them. In just that regard, I have one of the greatest jobs on the planet. I enjoy coming to work, and for that I'm grateful. My boss on the other hand, is a whole different story. It's weird; I feel totally burnt out at work - but it's not at all from my time with the girls. It's just from my boss. My actual time with her is quite minimal, but the effects of our interactions are life-draining. I'm getting side-tracked. Regrouping....
Little graces. Beginning early this morning I was feeling the muscles in my trapezius area beginning to tighten and pull - a sign of high levels of stress, but I've been blessed with little graces and feel loved because of them.
Lily has been a tad distant with me this week. She's been away at an all-day Animal Kingdom camp so we haven't had the opportunity to spend much time together. It's been a quick hello in the morning before she leaves and then when she gets home in the afternoon/evening she's so tired that she's grumpy and on the verge of meltdown on my way out the door. When I came in the house this morning she was a bit more of her playful self with me. With great joy I shared with her that today is our "nanniversary" and that we'd celebrate next week when we'd all be together. I received a huge hug and, "Wow Nellie! Another year we got to be with you!" in response. Grace number one.
As Mia and I were leaving the house for our play date today, I found a little treasure on my car. I had leant some books to a friend and upon returning them [by tying a bag to my mirror] he also left a little token of gratitude with a simple note expressing appreciation. The smile they brought to my face and the touch of ease to my muscles were great. Grace number two.
While on our drive to our play date I received a text from a friend, "Anything I can say or do to help make this day wonderful?" What's amazing is I know, though he lives in CA, if it were within his means and ability, he'd do it. He proceeded to send me texts with scripture verses and encouragement. Grace number three.
The huge blessing for me with today's play date is that it was with a sweet friend of mine. [It's fun when the kids are friends; it's great when you're actually friends and not just mere acquaintances with the other parent(s).] Sweet Mel blessed us by sharing part of her birthday with us. I had such a great time getting to hang for a few hours catching up on life, jobs, family, and much laughter. Shoot, she even let me vent. And vent. Okay, and vent some more. Thanks Mel; you're such a sweet trouper. The fact that we got true quality, un-rushed, time was fantastic. Lunch was yummy [food even seems to taste better when shared with friends]. And of all days we could have had a play date, she chose her birthday. [It could have simply been scheduling and the only available time she had this week, but I'm going to selfishly choose to believe that there is birthday significance. ;)] HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELANIE! The time, vulnerability, and laughter we shared was such a boost to my weary soul. Grace number four.
My grandma, who lives in the mountains of Montana, sent me a simple picture [via txt - a whole screen full] of some very beautiful and colorful wildflowers. I don't even know if she knows wildflowers [along with daisies and sunflowers] are my favorite. They are so simple, elegant, beautiful. Grace number five.
I love your blog. Thank you so much for sharing your true self here. Please know that even when it cannot be said, you are truly loved a lot.
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